langweilig

Hello all, i love you (: you know what, i say it a lot but i still do mean it! i mean, i say it only because i mean it.

Anyway, i just wanted to let you know that I'm tired of airing my opinions on a blog, airing opinions in such an uninterrupted and lengthy manner...im not tired of writing, but i just personally feel that me airing my opinions is rather pithily opinionated. I really do appreciate you reading them and even more for responding, but in the meantime I'm feeling utterly inadequate to be musing on human life and the condition of it and presumptuous to have done so. Having said that, I love people and the life, actual life, i see around me. It's just getting slightly complicated and rather more difficult to reconcile to past and present ideals. It's as if each person had their ideals forged into pieces of parchment, each one neatly bordering another's, floating..mine's slightly frayed at the edges at the moment, charred that alluring blackbrown..maybe I should leave it as such...

That is a thought. I don't think it'll ever fit back into the same niche it had before though. Either way, I suppose, it's quite fine? Perhaps not, but we shall see. (: With that though, I must add that I adore reading your blogs, simply because they make me agree, make me laugh, make me wonder, and because I think words are such beautiful, truthful, yet manical things. And because I like you, of course.

I don't know if you understand what I say...not that you're dull, of course :P but because a friend of mine said that it was difficult to.

There's one thing I want to note, though. The other day, I saw a whole trail of ants. I was sitting there just watching them and realised there were two lines, one going one way, the other the opposite way. Each time an ant passed by another ant going the opposite way, it stopped to like, touch noses or talk or whatever them cute ants do - without fail! I was impressed (: And then I saw a black speck that was not moving, but all the ants stopped by it. Closer inspection showed it to be a dead ant...the poor thing. ): They were all stopping by to pay homage, and I really do wonder what they thought and what they felt. I felt so sorry for this one especial ant, that just stayed beside that dead ant for the entire time I was watching the ants...it really did look so sad. You might not have seen an ant look sad but I assure you that ant positively was drooping its little antennae things...if they have them. It was sad!! And it was so loyal. ): Poor ant. They really do make you think.

Anyway I think I'm curious about a great too many things that would probably not do to ask, and I think I finally do realise how curiousity could possibly kill the cat in a normal context for the idiom. You know, not like, I wonder where that gunshot came from but just generally in this universal, intricate world of ours.

After much of that random thinking, though, I have to add that no matter how much I think and muse and ponder, the only solution that I can find really is God..So simple, yet so intangible!

And there was this morning I got awoken early, and though I couldn't see the sky, I just absolutely felt and could see in my mind, a red morning with a purple overlay, an interwoven twig with two chirping birds. The birds really were chirping, and it was just such a cause for my soul to sing with the world. :D

Anyway, love to you all and respect if you get this far haha. (: